Vocation Information
Sister Joy's Convent Files
November, 2006
It's Monday night, and tomorrow is election day. I am very excited, because there is actually a candidate I agree with for whom I can vote tomorrow. He's right on the life issues, but he's also right on the social justice and civil rights issues. That's a rare combination. I am generally a "lesser of two evils" voter, because I am a hybrid... conservative on some issues, liberal on others. I have held my nose, figuratively speaking, when voting Democrat, and held my nose when voting Republican. But tomorrow I am actually happy about casting my vote! I won't say who my vote is going to; I just want to share how nice it is to not be frustrated and wary as I prepare to cast my vote.
And in thinking about the election, I have done a lot of reflecting on the word "election." The concept of election is pretty important in theology... God's election of Abraham as the progenitor of a chosen people, Jesus' election of the outcast, sick and sinner alike, as disciple, and discovery of one's personal election to religious life or married life or single life. "Election" in our slick, K-street, marketing-driven economy means barbed ads, winners and losers, politicking and scandal. It's ugly. But "election" in God's Reign is an everybody-wins situation. God chooses Abraham, not to throw dirt in the faces of the other nomadic families and peoples, but to use Abraham to bring salvation to the world, first through the saving Law and then through the saving Lord. God chooses me not because I am such a refined person or really smart or pious or even good. God chooses me to be a co-laborer, and God's choosing is non-competitive... I don't "win" at someone else's expense.
As I was in adoration tonight, I thought for the millionth time about how unlikely this all is... me, the convent, Jesus, the Blessed Sacrament. How did I get so lucky? How did a gal like me end up in a place like this? I am preparing to celebrate and affirm in a special way God's election of me and my reciprocal election of God's will. I will be making my first vows of chastity, poverty, and obedience. My first years in the convent have been wonderful (although at times difficult) adventures, and I am setting out on a new course, moving to Spain after I make my vows this January 6. I don't plan to continue these files; I think their task is done. I wanted in these reflections to demonstrate my own struggles and joys, mainly so that those who may be fighting their own call to religious or ordained life may realize that it is okay to be confused, reluctant, and even just plain wrong sometimes. Being called is not incompatible with being sad, angry, tempted, proud, worried, silly, delighted, loud, bold, unsure, or any other human characteristic.
Those who have read these files have prayed with and for me, emailed me, called me, agreed with me, chided me, and challenged me to be my best self. I hope I've not scandalized anyone too much with my occasional irreverence and frequent questioning. If anything, these at-times rambling chronicles have affirmed that you don't have to have it "together" all the time to be able to be a happy, fulfilled Christian!
So, I guess this is farewell, or something close to it. Maybe I'll do a Christmas file if the mood strikes. But the Convent Files have reached their natural end. My formation isn't at an end, however, and neither are my questions, my a-ha moments, or my times of perplexity. Count on my prayers as I count on yours.
Peace,
Sr. Joy